Comments on translation - phase 92

[Sergio Nova]

Comments on phase 92

[[Again, I am reducing comments on punctuation to the least.]]
page 01 - Everyone is fine, no matter where! (everyone is singular, and the rule does not authorize plural verbs)
page 03 - You must really be a motorball nut, huh? (missing comma)
page 03 - I have to disagree here.
1) I do NOT like Chavez (it is a question of good sense, simply), but he is not a dictator. He is elected.
2) I cannot see why the dog is named after him.
3) Chavez is a VERY common surname in Spanish language territories.
page 04 - OSS - I have been unable to find the explanation.
page 05 - How are things looking on your end, Kaos? (missing comma)
page 06 - …as best as they can…(conjunction in panel 3)
page 06 - Our broadcast will make people aware… (no “the”).
page 07 - Would you please elaborate, Mr. Kaos? (question mark)
page 08 - They will find it out sooner or later, anyway… (missing pronoun; missing comma)
page 08 - I'll give this to you, young lady! (missing comma)
page 09 - Nya! (What does it mean?)
page 09 - Do you think it will be all right, though…(standard spelling)
page 10 - Your problem is that you overthink things, Kaos. (missing comma)
page 10 - You may be able to see radio waves, but… (missing comma)
page 14 - Hey, Scrapyard! (missing comma)
page 16 - Way to explain it, Mr. vector! (missing comma)
page 17 - All right! (standard spelling)
page 17 - Why don't we make a little "democratic" wager? (missing question mark)
page 18 - Drink some tea! It will help you sober up! (punctuation)
page 19 - Alita used to sing in my bar, you know? (missing comma, missing question mark)
page 20 - Robo-Asyl (Named after Pro Asyl, a German based association that fights for the rights of discriminated or persecuted people all around the world.)
page 24 - Let the final match of the 10th ZOT tournament… (missing ellipsis, as the phrase continues in the next picture; either we say ZOTT or ZOT tournament)

[TargaryenX]

page 01 - Everyone is fine, no matter where!

This line, in literal Japanese is: "Everyone is fighting, in a variety of places"

In retrospect I think it might sound better as: "Everyone is fighting, wherever they may be"

page 09 - Nya! (What does it mean?)

I'm not really sure...The original Japanese sound was "Ih!". I interpreted it as sort of a "sticking out my tongue" noise, even though she isn't.

[Sergio Nova]

In retrospect I think it might sound better as: "Everyone is fighting, wherever they may be"

I do not want to sound as a perfectionist (or I do, whatever), but once everyone is singular, you would have to rewrite the phrase saying Everyone is fighting, wherever he may be. Politically correct people (not my case) would say Everyone is fighting, wherever he or she may be. Because of that, I suggested a neutral construction.

page 09 - Nya! (What does it mean?)

I'm not really sure...The original Japanese sound was "Ih!". I interpreted it as sort of a "sticking out my tongue" noise, even though she isn't.

Would it not be something like Bah!?

[TargaryenX]

Ah, I see what you mean. I don't always notice things like that being a native speaker. Your way is definitely more correct, although it still sounds odd to me. I think I'd lean towards "Everyone is fighting, wherever he or she may be". "Bah!" sounds good.

[Sergio Nova]

I think I'd lean towards "Everyone is fighting, wherever he or she may be".

Ah! Ah! So you opt for the politically correct way?
Done!

[crazyankan]

in page 9: I know that "nyaa", is the Japanese word for the cat sound "meow".
But it doesn't make so much sense :/

[TargaryenX]

Crazy: In my head, it was supposed to be "nya" as in "nya nya na-nya nya" or its equivalent "neener neener" which is what little kids say when they're teasing someone. I think "Bah!" is a good subsitution.

92 changes

Page 03
You may remove my translator note. However, I have no idea why she would name her dog after any other Chavez, especially since Spanish is (as far as we know) an extinct language at this point in history. Hugo Chavez dissolved Venezuala's legislature and exerts full control over his nation's broadcast media. The only reason he isn't a dictator in name as well as deed is because his "elected" status has never been challenged.

Page 04
panel 4
Text: Unbeatable! (I was content to simply erase this in my release because I couldn't decipher the cursive characters. I tried harder this time)
Translator Note: ...when they take a stance. (one strikes a pose, but takes a stance. Why, I do not know)

Page 05
panel 4
Kaos: ...during the breaks but it didn't help. (once again filling in the blanks. I thought it read awkwardly with Kaos trailing off and then Nova coming in with his own line)

Page 06
panel 1
Nova: ...and observe Ketheres, I witnessed the beautiful drama of Alita's rebirth!! (sounded strange before)

panel 2
Kaos: But right now because of the problems in Tiphares, it's... (removed comma, I have an unhealthy love of this punctuation mark that sometimes gets the better of me)

Page 07
panel 1
SFX: BASHAA

Page 10
panel 1
SFX: byuuu

Page 13
panel 2
SFX: OOHH

Page 17
panel 3
SFX: waaaa

Page 18
panel 2
SFX: muku

panel 5
SFX: wa wa

Page 19
panel 2
SFX: wa wa

Page 21
panel 2
SFX: wa wa

Page 24
I realized this too after I released it...ZOT Tournament sounds more dramatic

[Sergio Nova]

Hugo Chavez dissolved Venezuala's legislature and exerts full control over his nation's broadcast media. The only reason he isn't a dictator in name as well as deed is because his "elected" status has never been challenged.

I agree with that point. Actually, he loves to make media silent.
His great friend Lula has not done that simply because he does not have the power, but he even tried.
For God's sake! I have an illiterate man as president.

[Cailon]

Didn't Chavez fight for the rights of indigenous people and tried to minimize the influence of the little rich (white) upper-class?
Anyway, excuse my poor knowledge, but here in europe we get very little information on South America in your daily news. In fact, we mostly have highly contra Chavez news and thus are the little pro Chavez news very whitewashed, too.

And, Chavez was named by Geriperi (see Bashaku Ando).

[Sergio Nova]

Chavez is a hypocrite who uses imbeciles like Evo Morales and Lula to reach his own goal - apparently, with great success. I would never call him a dictator because - for better or worse - he is elected - that is, Venezuelans chose him. But he does have the calling.

[crazyankan]

1/2 is ready.
Will probably finish this chapter by tomorrow.
So maybe a release before the weekend.

[crazyankan]

Final proofreading by Sergio.
Expect release today